Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Lord, all I wanted is someone who will not give up on me.

Dal, alam mong kung nagkabaligtad tayo ng sitwasyon, hindi kita igi-give up. Sana wag mo akong i-give up.

I am adamant in not letting you go because I still have the conviction God has put into my heart about you, back when we were first dating.

Lord, sana kung ikaw man ang may plano ng lahat, i-prove mo naman sa akin na plano mo nga ang lahat.

--reiman 06/16/2010

Posted at 09:50 am by reiman_ph
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Monday, March 22, 2010
Looking for Your hand

Lord I don't know how I can get out of this mess.
I am tired and so is she.

But I will continue to put my hope in you and look for your hand. I know you will deliver us out of this quagmire.

I am so helpless.

But my hope is in you.


Posted at 10:13 am by reiman_ph
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Thursday, March 11, 2010

All I ever desired is for her to not give up on me.

Seems like she did.

I'm at the lowest ebb of my life. right now.

God give me grace please...

Posted at 12:03 am by reiman_ph
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Saturday, October 03, 2009
Prove me wrong

Sometimes I fear maybe I'm not chosen
You've hardened my heart like Pharaoh
That would explain why life is so hard for me

And I am sad Esau hated
Crying against what's fated
Saying father, please, is there any left for me?

Cast out my doubts, please prove me wrong
'Cause these DEMONS can be so headstrong
Make my walls fall, please prove me wrong
'Cause this resentment's been building
Burn them up with your fire so strong
If you can before I bail, please prove me wrong

I fear maybe this is all just a game
Our friends and our families all play too
Harness the young and give some comfort to the old

Don't let my doubts prove true
Draw me close and hold me near to you
Keep me still until the day you...

Cast out my doubts, please prove me wrong
'Cause these DEMONS can be so headstrong
Make my walls fall, please prove me wrong
'Cause this resentment's been building
Burn them up with your fire so strong
If you can before I bail, please prove me wrong

--Caedmon's call, Prove me wrong.

Prove me wrong, Lord.

Posted at 05:50 pm by reiman_ph
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Thursday, October 01, 2009
On Mountaintops and Valleys

The Place of Exaltation

. . . Jesus took . . . them up on a high mountain apart by themselves . . . óMark 9:2

We have all experienced times of exaltation on the mountain, when we have seen things from Godís perspective and have wanted to stay there. But God will never allow us to stay there. The true test of our spiritual life is in exhibiting the power to descend from the mountain. If we only have the power to go up, something is wrong. It is a wonderful thing to be on the mountain with God, but a person only gets there so that he may later go down and lift up the demon-possessed people in the valley (see Mark 9:14-18 ). We are not made for the mountains, for sunrises, or for the other beautiful attractions in lifeó those are simply intended to be moments of inspiration. We are made for the valley and the ordinary things of life, and that is where we have to prove our stamina and strength. Yet our spiritual selfishness always wants repeated moments on the mountain. We feel that we could talk and live like perfect angels, if we could only stay on the mountaintop. Those times of exaltation are exceptional and they have their meaning in our life with God, but we must beware to prevent our spiritual selfishness from wanting to make them the only time.

We are inclined to think that everything that happens is to be turned into useful teaching. In actual fact, it is to be turned into something even better than teaching, namely, character. The mountaintop is not meant to teach us anything, it is meant to make us something. There is a terrible trap in always asking, "Whatís the use of this experience?" We can never measure spiritual matters in that way. The moments on the mountaintop are rare moments, and they are meant for something in Godís purpose.


Posted at 04:11 am by reiman_ph
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Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Love heals your heart

"Love Heals Your Heart"

Did you think you were immune to this
Did you think you could escape without infection
You do all you're able to resist
Just to avoid the danger of rejection

Memory warns you of the past
When it all went wrong

When you think your life is shattered
And there's no way to be fixed again
Love heals your heart
At a time you least expected
You're alive like you have never been
Love heals your heart

Everybody has a wall to climb
That was built to guard the pain that holds them captive
Every smile that they would hide behind
Will try to mask the hurt beneath the surface

Sometimes it's hard to understand
How we're trapped inside

Love will heal our heart...

Posted at 08:23 am by reiman_ph
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Sunday, September 20, 2009
Messed things up again

I'm still torn inside. My only energy to get going is the promise that God gave me the blessing to court her. To love her. She says she still loves me, although she admitted something has changed.

And everyday I feel that change. Everyday I'm hurt by that change. She doesn't say I love you as often as she used to. She's almost always not in the mood for a friendly chat. She is not open anymore to her feelings.

No one is to blame but myself. Because of my insensitivity I have hurt the woman I love, and put myself in this mess.

Everytime I cry, everytime I lose hope, everytime I feel down, I beseech God to help me make it through. Everytime she goes cold, I fallback and ask His grace to move forward. To never give up on her.

If she only knew how much I would like to change things. If she only knew how much I love her.

If she only knew...

Everyday my hope is that light at the end of this dark tunnel I am going through.

God help me make it through this dark night.

And God, please tell her that I love her so much.

Posted at 09:01 am by reiman_ph
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Wednesday, September 16, 2009
God on Rey


I was working one day, listening to one of Kutless' album. Suddenly I got swayed, didn't know what hit me. First the melody, next, the lyrics.

And then there I was, stupefied. Crying. Shamefully hiding my face from the CCTV camera in the ceiling. What did me in was the thought that with my many even-thoughs, many bugs, blemishes, defects and unnumbered unusualness, He never gave up on me. And He never will. That's His promise. A promise for my lifetime.

Promise of a Lifetime

I have fallen to my knees
As I sing a lullabye of pain
I'm feeling broken in my melody
As I sing to help the tears go away
Then I remember the pledge you have for me

I know you're always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I'm clinging to
the promise of a lifetime

I hear the words you say
To never walk away from me
and leave behind
The promise of a lifetime

Will you help me fall apart
Pick me up, take me in your arms
Find my way back from the storm
And You show me how to grow through the change

I still remember the pledge you made to me...

I am holding on to the hope I have inside
With You I will stay through everyday
putting my understanding aside.

I am comforted...

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans :38-39

That's God. His love, real. Resolute.
Bent on bending me for His glory.


Posted at 02:18 am by reiman_ph
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Tuesday, September 01, 2009
The Boss

Yes, he is the bully type. Although we haven't personally met, we've talked over the phone and communicate via email and chat every shift via the networking room.

He treats our group in ways like he treated our counterparts in India. He says WTF and f#ck a lot especially if there are lots and lots of work. Sure, we need to address those BUT we can only do so much.

Almost everyday he tries to intimidate us. Naaah. Probably some are, im not. Earlier today I almost heard a pop in my head when he said "And why the hell...yada yada yada."

Some of the level 2's are also a pain. Some don't communicate politely, especially that guy with the Arab-ish name. C'mon, man. My friends are also in the networking room and they can see what you're saying. rudely. to me.

Top management says the work quality dramatically improved since we came. Well, *the boss sure is not happy with it.

I wanted to stay for a few years. Not anymore. I'm leaving. Everyone in the group are. Goodluck monitoring YOUR client's WAN at the same time troubleshooting their LAN. Good luck talking to George Schnider.

Let the boss do the work. If he cannot attend to and solve as much problems as needed, he can always do what he likes to do. Say...stuff. This time directed to...himself.

Well for the meantime, I will TRY to coexist peacefully with him. I want the real Boss' praise anyway. 


Posted at 08:50 pm by reiman_ph
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Sunday, July 19, 2009

Ang hirap naman ng nakabitin sa ere.

Mas mabuti na lang na lumipad ka o lumagapak sa ibaba, eh.

Pero nakabitin?


Akala ko ba okay na ang lahat simula nung 25 2008?

Make the decision final and stick with it. Please.

Posted at 09:03 am by reiman_ph
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April 14th 1979  (Age 38)
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